My life feels like swings and roundabouts at the moment, I don’t seem to know whether it’ll go my way or not at the moment.
I’ve finally got all the pieces to re-build my PC, I lost count of the cost ages ago, but it all seems to be coming together; all I have to do now is save up enough to pay the person who’ll be guiding me through the process. What a learning curve that’ll be.
I also have my first driving lesson on Saturday; to be honest I’m not sure what to think of it at the moment. I tend to be able to live without items or skills that others seem to think are mandatory, like a mobile for instance – I only have one as I was given it, I seem to be swaying towards the same mind frame with driving. I know it’ll help me a lot more than a mobile ever will and that I'll need it at some point, but, to be totally frank, the prospect of being on the road scares me, as I've had masses of near misses as a pedestrian. Most were the drivers fault rather than mine as they all seem to happen on pelican crossings; but I just can’t shake this feeling that at one point I'll lose concentration and be the cause rather than the victim, and have it turn out a lot worse than a “near-miss”.
The work at school is a bit lighter at the moment, but the subjects are getting more complicated. Maths has a lot more to remember than any subject (I’m also sick of adults who did O-levels, where everything had to be remembered, harping on about how things are easier, I’d like to see them go through all this again, as it certainly doesn’t seem easier). Physics is also both boring and complicated, the Mechanics is boring as I've done it all before and the Waves is complicated as I've just skipped half the questions in a homework as I didn't understand it.
My fatigue is also getting worse, I write my entries at this time of night as I can’t sleep, then because I've been up late I'm tired in school, the lessons where you’re just talked at make this worse, as I dozed off in maths today during Mrs Ball’s explanation. It also happens in Physics and select systems lessons with Mr Finn.
I also seem to be distracted a lot more recently. Be it some discussion that sparks my interest, or just the usual Wednesday afternoon maths degeneration. I think it’s fair to say my concentration is shot to bits.
